Monday, March 10, 2008

Ok, so I might be imagining things, I started thinking that maybe the nurse put the cap back on before she laid the syringe on the bed and then took it back off before putting it in the hub of the IV, I am not sure. I will watch closely next time and say something to her if she does not do it as she is suppose to. I feel awful about my earlier post. I don't want to come off as a rude person, I just want Ava to be as healthy as possible and to stay clear from infections, especially if they can be prevented.

I am really frustrated, not at anyone, just the whole situation. I just want it to be easy. I hate crying in front of people, but today I can not hold back the tears. Just sitting in her room, by myself, the tears turn on. I just pray that the day comes soon for all FOUR of us to be home together.


JanaO said...

Hang in there! You have every right as a parent to want your child to be safe if you see something wrong you should speak up. Don't worry if the person thinks you are a tattletale they will get over it, it would take Ava longer to get over an infection then it would the nurse to get over being chastised. You are a strong women and you are intelligent enough to know when something is wrong. Just hang in there I know we will being seeing you all together soon!


Isabella said...

This is the first time I have gotten on today, but my heart is going out to you. I think while we are at CMH, we walk around almost like zombies. We just go day by day trucking along, and then all of a sudden, we have days like this. Days where the world is crashing and the tears are flowing. It is so frustrating when you feel like things are not moving along. I know that sense of dread you have before you walk in each morning to find out if your precious baby has taken steps forward or taken steps back. I recall so many times walking in and Bella had taken steps back and my heart would just sink. Now that you have both Kaden and Ava and your babies are in different places, it makes it so hard. You are sad when Kaden in gone because you miss him and you are torn when he is here because you want to be with both Kaden and Ava. There is no easy solution, and it is so frustrating. And don't feel bad for crying!! You need to have these days. I think they are growing days, because we need to break down once in a while. Also a little advice on the no sleeping: Benadryl or Tylenol PM work great!! Trust me, I would have not gotten through last year without them!!
So Amy, if you need anything, please call me. I will e-mail you my home number because I don't always have my cell on me. I am serious, I am here all day everyday.
Love Ya!!
Praying Always