Monday, May 4, 2009's a secret

Saturday, Nate and I had a wedding to go to. My parents watched the boys and took them shopping (as they do the first weekend of every month to get new toys and books). We of course, came home late and the boys were already sleeping. So come Sunday, Kaden woke up and grabbed white. First thing he types "like to run Kaden's friends off vent." I helped him with his sentence, so he retypes it "I like to run with my friends when I am off my vent." He then continues by typing "lets go." I couldn't help but laugh. Shortly after he reminds me that he went shopping with grandpa and grandma the day before. He then types "Kaden got mommy disney card snow white mothers day." I laughed and reminded him that it is suppose to be a secret :). He is so funny.

So, as I mentioned before, it has almost been a year since we lost Ava. This Thursday will mark the year. As you all have probably heard over and over again, we miss her terribly. There is not a day that goes by that she is not thought of. There are no words to describe our feelings and the pain that we feel every day although it may not be mentioned. Well, a little while ago I was scheduling appts. for Kaden. I think with my lack of sleep at the time (having a newborn and just returning to work)I was not thinking clearly and scheduled several of his appts. for Thursday. When making it, I knew something was significant for this day, I just couldn't put my finger on it until I got them all scheduled. I am so upset with myself. It is already difficult to go to Children's Mercy. I am nervous and can already imagine how difficult it will be on Thursday. I could put the appts. off, but some of them Kaden really needs and I can not put his needs off because of mine. After a long day at CMH on Thursday, we will come home to go to Kindergarten round up for Kaden. It will be a busy day, but the whole time I will have little Miss Ava on my mind.

I know I need to post pictures, it just takes so much time and I don't have the time to give right now. I will try to do it this weekend.


brad.kellie.carter.lucy said...

I don't know if I've commented before, but I have been following your blog. Your children are beautiful and you are such an inspiration--you seem to handle it all with such ease. I will be thinking of you Thursday.
~Kellie, mom to Carter, LCDH

Niff said...

I hope you're able to find comfort on Thursday, and I hope Kaden's appointments go well. I admire your strength.

Kaden sounds like a complete ham! How often is he allowed off the vent? It sounds like he's acclimated to life and doesn't let it stop him from doing anything. Go Kaden!

Isabella said...

You are always in our thoughts and prayers and you will be heavy on my mind on Thursday.

Caden said...

I will be thinking of you all day tomorrow. I hope being at the hospital with Kaden isn't too much to handle. I also hope his appointments go well.



Rachel said...

Unfortunately, the kiddos never learn to keep secrets. My 14yr old can finally hold secrets, but unfortunately his two brother (ages 10 & 8) ruin that for him.

It's still the thought that counts. LOL
Kaden is so cute!

As for Thursday, do not beat yourself up over the mistake of making appointments. I truely believe that Ava is the one that wanted you to make those on Thursday to keep you busy and to take you to the place that she once lived.
I know that you will be sad, but having Kaden and Brody is a miracle in itself and Ava is trying to remind you of that.

She is your Angel!!! Perfect little Angel and she wants her brother to get his medical exams and to be ok.

Thinking of you always and I will have you all on my mind Thursday.


The Bryant Family said...

Kaden is so darn smart.....
I will be thinking of you on Thursday....

Caden said...

I'm sorry, for some reason I thought yesterday was Wednesday. Make no mistake though, I will be thinking of you... tomorrow.


mkowalczyk said...

I will be thinking of you and Angel Ava tomorrow. I hope Kaden's appointments go well.

Liz and Shane said...

I am thinking of you and will have you in my prayers.
Kaden is so cute.